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The Ultimate Choice–You Make the Call

I choose peace.

It’s my final blog of 2019, and I’ve saved an unlikely story of hope to leave you with. May you carry the spirit of its message into 2020 . . .


Not much else fires up my blood pressure like dealing with the CA DMV or DIRECTV. Since my California days have passed, TV trouble calls now top the list.

So when I faced my second talk with DIRECTV in two weeks, I felt stress oozing through my body.

See, my last call didn’t go so well. I’d asked for a refund on a “free” add-on promotion I’d failed to cancel after the free period. Despite my argument over their questionable renewal notice, I lost the battle for reimbursement.

Incredulously, the call ended with the rep pitching me a new “free” promotion. Seriously???

Up went the blood pressure.

So back to that second call—another bill issue. Based on the last experience, my stress response was preparing me for war.

But wait—I didn’t want a fight.

What I wanted was to be heard in a fair, respectful conversation. With that intent, I stepped into the student role and chose a few good tools that teacher-me would have recommended:

    • “Stay present in your body”—I focused on my breath to keep my mind from taking over.

 

    • “Speak with respect”—I really listened and reflected to the DIRECTV rep that I’d heard what he’d said.

 

    • “Remember that we’re all connected”—I pictured the rep, not as a voice but as a human. One with a job in which callers verbally beat up on him every day. And I let this image influence the words I used, so that he’d feel valued.

I didn’t yield my position but I did wrap it in civility. And that’s exactly what the rep—and his manager—returned to me. It felt like a healthy school-sponsored debate.

So how’d this ignitable conversation avoid combustion? The three tools above helped set a respectful tone, which allowed the manager to really hear me, stay open-minded, and eventually reconsider his position.

Refund granted!


Sometimes kindness and peace come in grand, heartfelt moments, like you’d see in a Hallmark movie. And sometimes they don’t.

Sometimes they’re spread through calmly traversing one challenging conversation at a time (even when we don’t get the refund) . . .

OR withholding hurtful words . . .

OR responding with compassion when another wrongs us.

In each of these examples lies an independent choice. A personal decision to bring peace to the world. It’s not some unachievable, naïve goal; it happens every time we use words or actions that strengthen rather than strain our connection to each other.

So as we journey into this holiday season and begin a new decade together, let’s choose kindness and peace. To a hope-filled 2020!


Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

Thank you for supporting We Bold Souls this past year; together we’ll create a peaceful world community, one moment at a time!

2 comments

  1. Maria Cecilia Victoria says:

    All I wanted and hope for was for
    Christmas and the Holiday Season to be bearable…however, there are certain events that made me think how long I anticipated it and how quickly it passed…

    I think that the Holiday Season is a time that tests our ‘nerves’ and brings out those ‘challenges’ that either provoke us to respond ‘kindly’ or to respond ‘towards the other end of the spectrum — stressfully’…my experience may be slightly different from what you experienced this Holiday Season…mine revolved around planning for a dinner for my darling husband and son…one did not mind what was on the menu as long as there was a dish that called for ‘365 black-eyed peas’ in it…the other one did not care much of what was on the menu, as long as I cut the vegetables big enough for him to pick out of the dishes I decided to make…not really a stressful moment some might think, but I was ‘the chef’…and a few days later, I received a request from my darling husband that we will have guests coming…my ‘Holiday Spirit’ was dwindling down so fast, I felt I would never recover…

    As I pondered upon ‘how busy’ I would be just thinking how I could please everyone and ‘how hectic’ the next few days were going to be, I took the time ‘to think about me first’…for it was the only way I would be able to deal with the tasks at hand…I took a walk outside and opened my greenhouse (let the air in and let it out of its winterizing mode for a few hours)…the greenhouse —- one of my places of refuge and reflection…I took a deep breath and went back into my home office and wrote down the menu and the modifications I needed for my recipes…I could not have too many ‘seafood’ on my traditional Spanish dish, Paella…’no onions’ or ‘bell peppers’ on any dishes (especially on the ‘noodle dish’) or at least cut them big enough to be picked out of the dish…same for the vegetables…’reduced amount of cinnamon’ on the Apple Pies…’no glaze’ on the Smoked Pork Ham…

    I put on my ‘being present’ to the moments that matter and ‘being grateful’ to face any type of challenges…

    I have loved what ‘We Bold Souls’ have shared throughout the year…I look forward to many more ‘be present/be grateful’ blogs and ‘moments to memories’…

    Sending you best wishes for a great New Year!

    Inf. Maria Cecilia Victoria
    ~ A Creative Journey Through Life ~

    • weboldsouls says:

      Such a great comment, Maria! You had me nodding in agreement with the holiday stressors and giggling with your “food modification list.” I’m so grateful that you’re part of the We Bold Souls family and that what I write has resonated. Happy New Year!

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